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Friday, October 17, 2008

you are what you are; dont feel bad when rejected

oncer i experienced break up, actually it was not the first time but it was the worst for sure. i felt a great pain inside, before that i was confidence that this would never happen to me. i become moody and keep listening to sad songs that keep reminding me about her. it seemed that i just could not accept what had happened. then i kept online to find tips to take this positively plus reading some books about psychology of love. then i really found some useful tips and i want to share it here to help others. to make they understand that break up is not the end of your life and they should take it positively. this article will help you about learning your self worth and not feel bad when being rejected.

People may hate or reject you for different reasons that does not relate whether you are good or bad at all. if you want to deal with rejection and get over it,It's time to know that your self-worth is something that is internal, even if the whole world rejected you, you are still whom you are. Don't change yourself to please others,because you will be selling your identity for acceptance. Be yourself and you will have friends and enemies just like everyone else.

But in order to be able to do that you must clearly know whom you are, and you won't be able to deal with rejection unless you have a written document of your strengths and weaknesses. You must know yourself, else people will tell you who you are. You must know what can you do before people create your borders for you. and of course you will then believe them, creating fake belief that limit your potential. Go now, document you abilities, document your self judgment and if someone matched your self judgment then they have got good insight else question his judgement abilities.

when you been rejected by someone, some people or even by the whole world, it feels real bad, You may not be knowing what to do, Maybe you started to scan yourself again searching for anything wrong within yourself in order to justify this rejection, or maybe you just labeled yourself a with labels like "looser" or "failure", or maybe you even became depressed

The shocking truth is the that main reason that can make you experience these bad feelings upon being rejected is thinking that your worth and your value depends solely on being loved and cared for. when we were children our culture and our parents taught us that we must be nice in order for people like us and that We must be good boys and girls so that mom and dad love us, so we grew up thinking that if people liked us and cared of us then we are good else we are bad or even worthless . We have tied our sense of self worth to others acceptance and so if we got accepted we feel happy else we feel down.

We know that the human mind can't rest until it have some reason or logic behind the external situations it faces, and that's why i will provide you with lots of reasons that could make somone hate you or reject you other than being worthless,those reasons will support you much on your journey for dealing with rejection. People could hate/reject you because:

  • They are being jealous of you (of your achievements, of your looks, of anything)
  • They are currently interested in someone else (if it's a relation rejection and that does not mean that you are bad,
  • They are afraid of you
    (maybe they fear that you take their job, their Gf/bf whatever)
  • Maybe because you ignored them without noticing
  • Maybe because you did hurt them and they were emotionally sensitive
  • Maybe because you have interests that conflict with their own interests.
  • Maybe because you look like someone they don't like
  • Their minds !! haltered is just a method that the person's mind uses to make sure that the he will stay away from the hated person(in this case it's you)
  • even in interviews those reasons could be possible,after all the person interviewing you is not from mars,he is a human and he experiences the same emotions of hatred and jealousy that humans experince
That are possible reasons for people rejecting you. its not your fault if your face looked like criminal or bad guy. its also not your fault if your partner is too sensitive. its not your fault if your partner likes some other guy, i believed you will find the better one. whatever happened, you must have self confidence, then everything will be better for you. person that reali love you, will accept you no matter how terrible you are. it is an unconditional love. like a love from a mother to a son. so why you must change for the people that judgin you and hope only you satisfied their needs? just like the lion story, you will be left one day, no matter how far you changed.

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