Internet Addiction: Realize it or not?

Internet addiction disorder is relatively a new term that was supported by some parties and criticized by others. The point of the debate was whether internet addiction is really a disorder or just a habit of over using a new technology. However, we don’t really care about who is right, what we care about is letting you know why you overuse the internet and how to get over it.

Although we won't argue if internet addiction is really a disorder, you may still consider the following as symptoms of overuse or incorrect use of the internet:

• You spend very long time on the internet
• You may stay online in-spite of suffering bad consequences (e.g having no time to study or even losing your job)
• You feel irritable when you try to reduce your use of internet
• You stay online longer than what you planned
• You depend on internet to get rid of bad moods

Why am I addicted to the internet?

Again there was a debate about that point, so what we will discuss here are some reasons that could result in overuse of the internet:

• External dependency and internet addiction :just like any other addiction, external dependency is a big factor. It is the state of total dependence on an external factor in order to feel happy or to escape bad mood.
• Internet addiction and the need for socializing: sometimes the real cause for internet addiction is just a real need for socializing, by way of chatting online excessively.
• Internet addiction for means of escape: some people overuse the internet just to escape from their problems. Usually those people have other problems that they don’t want to face. Therefore, they use the internet in order to forget about them

The problem with internet addiction is that its not in the spot lights nor its regarded as dangerous as other types of addiction. This allows this type of addiction to escape unnoticed in most cases. The same happens with love addition which is being unable to live without a loving partner nor tolerating being alone as i discussed it before. People keep denying that they got addicted to internet or love when i told them, it is because most people do not realize that they are really having serious addiction. Why i'm writing this, because i feel that i almost addicted to the internet and i won't let it happen!

How To Forget Someone That You Really Love? (final)

It took me three days to get over the worst ever and a week to recover fully. In the past, it used to take me about one or two months to recover from a breakup. Nothing has changed in this period of time, I am still the same person, I do still have feelings and my attitude towards relationships is almost the same, the only thing that has changed is my knowledge about relationships.

Understanding what makes a relationship healthy and what makes it "yet another relationship" is vital to the recovery process. Just like me, you can recover in few days if you understood the relationships facts that are not known to the most.

If I was to summarize all of the methods to getting over someone in three lines I would have said “Forget about what you saw in the movies, have realistic expectations to understand the difference between needing someone and loving someone and know that there is nothing called the one or the soul mate”

There are lots of factors that interact together in such a way that they make quick recovery not possible. It all starts with an unmet need that the person needs to fulfill, maybe he is feeling lonely or missing warmth in his life, maybe his friend ignore him or maybe he misses love in his life, maybe he wants to proof to himself that he is worthy or maybe he just needs approval from his new lover. All unhealthy relationships start with such needs and then in the second step the media brainwashes people making them think that the solution to all of their problems lies in finding the so called “soul mate”.

If people have such a pattern of thinking then there is no wonder that they never recover quickly, if the soul mate is the solution to all problems and if they need him to satisfy their unmet needs but in the same time he is not there then how come will they recover??

By understanding the real need behind loving someone you may discover that you are in love with that person because of a personal that you are having and not because he is your soul mate. For example, if you found that you really needed that person because you were feeling lonely then the correct solution to getting over him is to deal with loneliness and not trying to get him back, Simply because you are not in love with him but you just need anyone to satisfy this unmet need of not feeling lonely.

I know what you are thinking of now, you are telling yourself "But no, if this was true then i could have fell in love with anyone, why him?". Of course you cant fall in love with anyone just because you are feeling lonely but instead you will fall in love with any guy who barely meets the criteria you have in your mind for your future partner (for more info click here)

Getting over someone is very simple but it just requires you to seek correct education about relationships so that you can fix your false beliefs about them. To summarize all of this, in order to recover in few days you need to change your beliefs about relationships by seeking proper education and you need to start a relationship only when you love the person and not when you have an unmet need that you want to satisfy.

Read all articles about recovering from break up and became stronger

How To Forget Someone That You Really Love? (part IV)

I can never forget about him…
He was the only one I ever loved that much…
I will never love someone else as I loved him…
I can never imagine myself being with someone else…
Do these phrases sound familiar? Have you been in that situation before?
If your answers are yes, then know that you were fooled and that you have been programmed to believe in the idea of “The one”.

The Myth of “The One”

Most romantic movies that you've seen, coupled with your imagination and lack of knowledge about the psychology of love have caused you to acquire a false idea about love, namely, thinking that there is something called “The One”. Everything that you see and hear programs your mind a bit and the more programming you receive about a certain idea, the more it's likely to eventually become a solid belief. This is exactly what happened with your idea about "The One". While reading this, you may find something inside you trying to resist the truth, but after looking at the following points you will realise that your belief was only an illusion.

Is the Concept of “The One” true?

• Anyone could fill that role: What actually makes you think that this person was “The one” is the sweet experience that you had with him. This experience is associated with that person and stored in your mind as one item, and so you think of both the experience and the person as one thing but actually they are two separate things. If you still aren't convinced, just wait and see what happens the next time you fall in love with someone and share that same sweet experience together. You will just forget about your old love and this new person will become the new "one".
• How many "ones" did you have before?: Just take a look at your past and you will discover that each time you fell in love you thought that this person was the one, that whatever happened you wouldn't be able to forget about him and that you won't be able to find someone like him again. What usually happens is that a few months later someone else appears in your life and becomes “the one” and so life goes on.
• The psychology of falling in love: As I said before, before you fall in love with someone your mind matches him against certain predefined criteria, if anyone matches these criteria you may end up falling in love wih him, but just because someone matched these criteria once and became “The one”, that doesn't mean that no one else can match it. What this actually signifies is that this person is currently the best match but sooner or later a better match could be found.
• Is this your first deep love experience? : If this is your first deep love experience, you will most probably believe in that false idea called “The one” more strongly simply because you have never experienced that emotional intensity with someone else before. In that case, you're not really to blame if you thought that he was the one, but the next time you enter a relationship, you will discover that it was the emotional intensity and not the person himself whom you loved.

Don’t Allow Someone to Program You

Why do you allow the media and people to program you? Why don’t you filter out these hundreds of programming messages you receive on a daily bases? Believing in the ideas that you see in movies like Sweet November or the ideas that you listen to in songs like the song my immortal will only make you suffer. It will slow down your recovery after break-ups and may keep you trapped forever. Isn’t it the time to start discovering the real truth instead of falling a prey to common myths?